A fine romance with no kisses
A fine romance, my friend, this is
We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes [to-mah-toes, dear]
But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed po-tah-toes [potatoes]
A fine romance, you won't nestle
A fine romance, you won't even wrestle
You've never mussed the crease in my blue serge pants
You never take a chance, this is a fine romance
A fine romance, my good fellow
You take romance, I'll take Jello
You're calmer than the seals in the Arctic Ocean
At least they flap their fins to express emotion
A fine romance, my dear Duchess
Two old fogies, we really need crutches
You're just as hard to land as the Ile de France! [Fronce]
I haven't got a chonce [chance], this is a fine romance
A fine romance, my good woman
jn hf m! dpnnsk
My strong, aged-in-the-wood woman
You never give those orchids I send a glance
They're just like cactus plants, [oh boy]
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